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This is it, guys - the number one tip to ensure you'll be a better lover to your female partner. Never (and I mean never ) penetrate a woman with anything unless she is well lubricated. Preferably, the lubrication will be her own vaginal fluid. That means you need to arouse her with touches, kisses, massage, oral sex... Whatever it takes.
Not only is intercourse without sufficient arousal painful physically, it makes for an overall unsatisfying experience.
True, this may mean that it takes a little longer to get to the intercourse part of sex, but come on! Can you think of anything else you'd rather have in front of you than your lover's body? Would you rather be doing anything else than giving her pleasure...and receiving it in return? (If so, go do it. Don't waste each other's time. Come back to sex when you have real passion and energy to devote to it.)
Don't worry, not all women need long stretches of arousal time. And those who do don't need it every time. We all get crazy-horny sometimes.